5.27.2016

The Twin Mom Questions


I thought I'd compose a fun little post in the day of the life of a pregnant twin mama for my 8 month post. I learned very quickly people are pretty interested in pregnant women, but FASCINATED when they find out about the twins. All filters and boundaries are gone. You become fair game to the 3rd degree. I'm the type of person who has no problem being open, to an extent, but I can see how some mothers cringe at this. And to be honest, some of the comments/questions blow my mind. Here are the most common ones I get every single day, multiple times a day, at work, grocery stores, hallways, through bathroom stalls, on the phone... Enjoy!

When are you due? // 
38 weeks is on July 7 and the last day doctors will a twin mom be pregnant. The plan is to cook these precious cupcakes as close to that date as I can.

Boy or girl? // 
Usually this is when I pipe up with two girls! And then the ooh, twins! questions and comments start rolling.


Are they identical or paternal? // 
And here is where I correct them with replying FRAternal twins.

Do twins run in your family?//
My maternal grandmother was a twin as well as my paternal grandfather.


I'm a twin! My mom's a twin! My friend just had twins! //
Yes, it is pretty common. But I had no idea how common until we became pregnant. I work for a surgeon who has twins and a sport's medicine doctor who is a twin, and our pediatrician we chose happens to be a twin herself.

How did you react when you found out? //
We saw two heartbeats before the tech said anything. I was shocked and Daniel laughed. We were just joking about it the night before our first scan and it took a bit to wrap our heads around it. Now we can't imagine it any other way.



Was it natural? //
Pretty invasive question for some, but I don't care. Indeed, very natural. So natural that we married on the last day of July, and got pregnant in October. Twins right away!

You're carry so small for twins! //
So I just found out the reason for this. Since it is my first pregnancy, my body isn't used to, well, being pregnant. It's never done this before. If it were my 2nd or 3rd pregnancy, my belly would be enormous because muscle memory stuff.


It's going to be so hard! 
Sweet, yes I know. I've had 8 months to think about that and a few more weeks to go! You can never fully prepare for any newborn, just as much as you can't fully prepare for twins. I'm deeply enjoying what I can while being mindful of how much work it's going to be. Will I freak out about it during my pregnancy? No, I won't. I choose to really feel how beautiful it is. Will I freak out afterwards? Absolutely, many times. It's all about breathing and perception and getting rest when we are able -- riding the journey as it unfolds. I think that is important with anything.

How are you feeling? 
Tired. Sometimes I feel like I look like a troll.


Have you had any symptoms? //
Of course. Nausea at the beginning, but never got sick, and exhaustion. Felt better for about oh, a few weeks in the 2nd trimester then the exhaustion hit and never left. Also, back pain, limb fatigue, shortness of breath, looking a hot mess, etc.

Crave anything weird? //
The only consistent craving has been oranges and avocados. Others include fish sticks, cheese quesadillas, fresh veggies and ranch, and oreo blizzards.


You must be miserable! //
You're making me miserable.

I couldn't even imagine! //
Then you probably shouldn't.


You're going to have a C-section right? //
People always assume. I certainly don't want one. It's a thought I've struggled with, but the girls will determine that. If I am able to avoid it and advocate my desires, then I absolutely will. But all I want is the best for them, obviously. They're both head down so we are praying they (especially Elsie) won't wiggle themselves back around.


Are you going to breastfeed? //
ABSOLUTELY. I am extremely passionate and adamant about breastfeeding and I will do everything in my power to make that happen. Everyone knows how strongly I feel about this.


But how will you breastfeed twins? // 
There are many ways. I am equipped with two very useful ways. There double the ways than with just one babe!

Were you expecting twins? //
Well, how do you expect twins?


Are you feeling them move? //
It surprises me this is a question I get quite a bit. Of course I feel them move -- all day long and it is my favorite feeling. I suppose I just assume all pregnant mothers feel their child/children move because that's a sign of a healthy, happy baby.

So you're getting it all done in one go!/Will you have any more children? //
We've been told the sooner we get pregnant again after twins, the more likely it will be to have twins...again. We will visit that possibility in due (a long) time. 



We are just so deeply excited and longing to meet the two beautiful souls we made. 
Only about 6 weeks to go. So soon, my darlings.


//
Photos by the magical Alyssa Wilcox Photography.


6 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. I follow you on IG and your girls look SO alike, I thought for sure they were identical! Have you done DNA testing? I've heard of several twin moms being told their twins were fraternal then finding out from DNA that they're indeed identical. I love twins! I have 3 boys, all grown now, so maybe one of them will have twins someday!

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  3. Yeah...as another twin Mom, it's so annoying when Dr's that don't know much about twin pregnancies say "Oh, they're definitely fraternal!" just because they have their own anniotic sacs and placentas. If the embryo split early, they're di/di identicals (meaning 2 sacs, 2 placentas). If the embryo split late, like mine, they're mono/di identicals (meaning 1 placenta, 2 sacs). The only way to know for sure if they're fraternal from ultrasound is if they are boy/girl! So many people are told their babies are fraternal by these Dr's when they are actually identical - it's more common than you'd think! Basically, if the babies look alike, and/or other people can't tell them apart - there's a good chance they are, and you should have them tested. It's so easy with the $99 cheek swab by mail these days, and you have results in 2 weeks. I think it's important to know, at least for health reasons!
    Ok ... off my soapbox! Haha

    Gorgeous babies - congrats Mama!! You've got this!

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  4. I will only advice every other woman TRYING TO GET PREGNANT or have FALLOPIAN TUBE issues, PCOS and other infertility problem to do their research and don’t base your option only on anyone’s advise, I did and it resulted in waste of money and time. I Contact Dr Eka on ( dreka14demons@gmail.com)  because I have discover Dr Eka. long time ago and I would have been pregnant earlier if I follow my heart and buy the herbal Medication but I disregard it because of my doctor’s advice and I am annoyed at myself but at the same time I am happy that I made the wise decision by going back to Dr Eka, for his Herbal Medication. Now I am a strong believer of this Herbal herbs natural medicine. Thank You. Dr Eka for bringing this joy into my home am so happy at last am now a mother & am the happiest woman on earth thank god i came back to your Herbal Medication. I know so many marriages out there finding it difficult to conceive I will surely encourage them to have fate and contact Dr Eka & BUY his Herbal Medication.

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