A candid from Memorial Day weekend. I love this one of him.

I think it's about time I tell you about my person. A brilliant human doing this thing called life with me. Several people have asked about our story and I think I put it off for so long because nothing I could ever type would live up to how this man makes me feel.

I met him in junior high and we flirted as much as awkward teenagers knew how to. He would be quite the gentleman and walk me to gym class every day after he'd copy my social studies homework. We'd exchange this awkward one-armed hug before we parted ways. He always held his binder off to the side. He always wore his Adidas sneakers and sported popped collars. Years, separate high schools, different people happened and it wasn't until a random afternoon in late spring I called him up. It was the end of 11th grade and warmer than usual in June. He was outside air drying from his post football practice shower. Whether it was curiosity, boredom, or an impulse, finding his name on my bulky Nokia phone was the best thing I've done. Nearly 7 years later, I'm marrying that nerd boy who pulled at my hair and copied my homework. He is my person and I have never been more sure of anything in my life.

We work because we are a hundred percent ourselves and we accept each other. One Direction often appears in mix CDs, we're health nuts and foodies at the same time. We both have passions for something; my writing and photography, his career and fitness. We both love nothing more than to spend quality time doing everything and nothing. We also know our own flaws and we make a conscious effort not to unload them on one another. We believe in patience and honesty and having conversations instead of letting adverse emotions overcome our words. We give each other grief all the time and joke around and the amount we still flirt hasn't changed a bit. And he has the best arms to snuggle with. The absolute best. I'm an arms and hands kind of girl; good arms are serious business and hands show hard work. His hands are rough and I love every callus. 

What we have is just so easy. It's always been easy with him. He is my oxygen when everything around me often becomes suffocating. He is the most gentle, kind, understanding man I have ever been blessed to meet. His light visibly radiates from his pores. 

Time and time again I have been asked how I knew he's the one. It wasn't some monumental moment where sparrows appeared in the branches of the trees and started to sing as we kissed in a warm embrace with cheesy background music. I knew he was the one when the butterflies didn't go away. I knew he was the one after I talked to him on the phone for 4+ hours as we watched YouTube videos at the same time. I knew it a couple nights ago when we literally could not stop laughing at some obscene thing I did. I knew as I held his head in one hand and a bucket in the other when he was so sick in the hospital as he puked out 2 liters of bile and I knew it on the last loop of the roller coaster we rode 7 times in Disneyland. I knew as I Googled hiccup remedies and tried them for hours because he couldn't stop hiccuping. I know each and every time he pulls the Forrest Gump when he blinks in pictures and when he plays with my hair and when we disagree and when we agree. How do you know ice cream will be delicious or that the moon will be up there in the night sky regardless if it's clear or if it's tucked away behind the clouds. I just know.

I know all the time.



As the days get warmer, I can feel my mood lift with the warmth of my skin. I think everyone goes through a bit of wintertime numbness and apathy. Life is a whole lot better when there's daylight to see it happen. I find I'm happier when I awake to daylight, like the universe wakes me gently instead of some abrupt darkness shoving me into the day ahead. For some reason, I'm about 100x more comfortable in my bed just as I awake during the spring than any other seasons. I've never been one to toss and turn but springtime offers a slumber far more peaceful than winter.  

I think I have arrived at a significant turn in my life. Where childhood and teenage years feel so far away, yet you don't know how you're suddenly 24 and a half. When you find elegant kitchen dishtowels and artwork more aesthetically pleasing than music videos and social media. I know I have only dipped my toes in adulthood but I feel really really content. I mean I just bought the most precious Audrey Hepburn children's book for my future daughter one day. If that's not a sign of womanhood then I don't know. I've read it a few times. I'm really in love with it.

It's so accurate when they say time only gets shorter with the way these months are flying by; you blink and you're suddenly an adult. Time is weird like that. I can't wrap my head around it. Other than getting bouts of nostalgia, I think I'm handling this young woman thing with as much grace as I can. 


The night I ruined my back and Godzilla.

Some of my favorite flowers Daniel bought for me.
This damn month. Along with other health stuff, I took a fall last night down some stairs and destroyed my back. It was one of the scariest moments of my life. My hands were full so I wasn't holding on and had nothing to catch my fall. I hit my back on the edge of the stairs full force completely knocking the wind out of me. I freaked out thinking I did some serious damage and I couldn't breathe. Today I saw a spine doctor and physical therapist, got some gnarly pain meds and muscle relaxants too. I had to get an X-ray but luckily I didn't break anything, stuff is just inflamed, bruised, and strained. Basically everything hurts, especially my chest and upper back, it sucks to move and I feel like I'm 80. 

Every time things get hard, I start to make mini goals and lists. It's either that or I start to pace around my room and throw things away. This past month hasn't been the least bit forgiving and if I have to see the inside of another doctor's office I will surely lose it, man. But never mind that. Here are some things I have finally gotten around to do, before I so gracefully fell of course:
  • Sent out a couple snail mail letters
  • Finally got my glasses so I can see real life things now
  • Caught up with a couple of good friends
  • Made a good rough draft of the wedding list 
  • Possibly decided on a wedding party 
  • Started an appropriate eating regimen for my work and gym schedule
Oh and I guess I should mention we're going to see Godzilla this Friday (if my back is up for it) and I've haven't been as equally excited and terrified in a long time. Huge shit that mobs up from the depths of the ocean is just no. Bigness, vastness, too-large-to-comprehend type of stuff scares me. But the mystery of it makes me all giddy and I know I'll be fidgeting and squealing like I'm about to see Santa or something. It kind of feels like how I always dry heaved as a little girl when everyone sang me happy birthday and I was just ridiculously nervous. I'm weird ok.

Have a beautiful second full week of May, sweet readers. 


Bits, pieces, and visions.

I have found so much comfort thrifting and decorating these days. Keeping my mind occupied has never failed to be the best medicine for worry and rumination. It has been such a treasure to put on my favorite songs and create like my soul is so inclined to do. It is in these moments I feel like my best self.

I like to find items with pasts and stories rubbed deep in the opaque glass, chipped paint layers, and tattered frames. Especially the frames. Whose lover's precious face was behind this glass before mine?

These are a few of my favorite nooks around my room. I'm also doing this as inspiration for our wedding and playing with different textures and colors to fit our antiqued garden theme. Anytime I prepare for an exciting project or adventure, I always manifest tell-tale signs in little areas of my life. I do things with purpose even without realizing it. 

I have always been that way.



Some tiny moments from a wet, dreary, and quite typical Washington weekend. Sometimes comfort food, free comics, a charismatic dachshund, and a gentleman you share your heart with are all you need to create sunshine.